All Hail the Heartbreaker
by BittersweetSonata
Summary: Laser lipstick? Check. Computer compact? Check. Lock-picking bobby pins and spy boy arm-candy? Double check. Ten page essay on the Extalia Revolution and handsome spy Natsu Dragneel? Wait, what? Welcome to the world of a teenage spy, or more specifically—Lucy Heartfilia.
1. Chapter 1

**chapter title: **This is How it Starts

**summary: **Where lipstick is a laser, your compact is a computer, and your boyfriend could be your enemy. Welcome to the life of a teenage spy, or more specifically—Lucy Heartfilia.

**pairings: **natsu ო lucy (main), gray ო juvia, gajeel ო levy, jellal ო erza

**setting: **haha, it's au, an awesome au

**notes: **kinda based off of Totally Spies, 'cause that was a wonderful part of my childhood, okay. when i was younger, i wanted to be sam, because sam was awesome and smart.

**thoughts: **omw, so like i just started watching free! iwatobi swim club and ohmyword it is just...there are no words. sure, i guess it's kind of like fanservice for girls, but still. i like the plot and all of the characters, so. my favorites are makoto (probably 'cause i'm so much like him) and gou (kou) and yeah. moving on now. i'm going to compile a playlist for this and maybe some of my other stories, and then i'll put it on my bio, kay? i guess, anyway.

**disclaimer: **own nothing

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_._

_{I'm here to collect your hearts}_

_._

* * *

Everyone has a turning point in their life. Some hit rock bottom, some get a boyfriend, some fall in love, but Lucy's was when she stopped a purse snatcher. It had been a normal Saturday, in all honesty, and the blonde had been out with a few of her friends.

Erza Scarlet, Levy McGarden, and the sixteen-year-old had been seated at a table in the food court—just enjoying lunch and deciding which shops to visit next—when a woman from somewhere in the crowd screamed. It took a moment, but the blonde had seen a man rushing toward their table, purse under his arm, and that was when it hit her.

All it took was one shared look with her two friends, and they went into action. Lucy—who had been sitting on the outside of their table—discreetly slid her tray full of food off the table. In all the murmuring of the crowds swarming around them and the shouts of mall security, no one heard the slab of plastic hit the tiled ground. The thief never knew what hit him, because when he slipped on the blonde's unfinished meal from Taco Bell, he was down for the count.

Levy reached a hand out and caught the purse, and before the man could get up and try his second attempt at escape, one of Erza's three inch heels belonging to her Madden Girl's was pressed firmly on his back. When the mall cops finally arrived on scene, Lucy smiled sheepishly and explained that she'd accidentally knocked her food tray off the table, which the thief had slipped on, and that Erza had just been 'retrieving' it for her.

Apparently, playing the slightly ditsy blonde worked for her, or the mall police were just so eager to take responsibility for catching the guy, because her lie was all the explanation needed. And, after receiving free lunch from Taco Bell (hers had been decimated by a purse snatcher after all), the girls had resumed shopping.

And everything had been normal. That is, until later that night.

Lucy had been reading quietly when her cell rang. The blonde glanced up from her book, and her brows furrowed when she glanced over at the electric clock sitting on her nightstand. She reached over and picked up her phone, frowning when she realized that the caller id read 'Caller Unknown.'

Her brown orbs flicked over to the neon green numbers that read 10:15 p.m. before accepting the call. "Hello?"

"_This is Lucy Heartfilia, correct?" _

The blonde blinked and waited a few seconds before answering. "Yes. Is there something I can help you with? Or, may I ask who's calling?"

'_Probably telemarketers. I didn't think they did that kind of thing over cellphones though…' _

"_I'm calling about your performance at the Magnolia mall earlier today." _

Lucy's brows furrowed and she set her book down. "I'm sorry, what?"

"_I was told about the incident at the mall today, with the purse snatcher. Apparently, although this information comes second-hand from a source that is not always reliable, you and your friends had something to do with catching him. Rather, I should say that you were _responsible _for apprehending him." _

The blonde waited in silence, not knowing what else to say.

"_Anyway, someone should be by to pick you up soon. Now, I have to go get ready because I have a date that I don't want to be late for, 'kay?" _

"Hey wait a second—," Lucy blinked when the line suddenly went dead, and she dropped her cell onto the bed.

Her back hit the mattress and she sighed. "What was that all about, I wonder?" she mumbled to herself, eyes trained on the ceiling. She laid there for a few seconds before something caught her eye.

The small glass figure of the Lyre her mother had given her when she was younger was rattling on a shelf. Several other trinkets and even her alarm clock began to wobble causing the blonde to sit up. The wind howled outside and Lucy fell off her bed in surprise when her balcony doors suddenly slammed open.

"Pardon my intrusion, ma'am, but I'm here to…" the familiar voice trailed off and Lucy poked her head up from the other side of the bed.

She gaped. "Loke?!"

Her redheaded friend gaped back at her in an ungentlemanly fashion. "Lucy?! You're the one I'm supposed to pick up?!"

"Excuse me? I don't think I understand…," the blonde peered around her astonished friend's shoulder. "Is that a helicopter outside my balcony?! Holy crap, my landlady is going to kill me!"

Loke quickly cleared his throat and offered her his hand to her. "Erm, Miss Heartfilia, I am here on direct orders to escort you to headquarters."

Lucy accepted his hand and he pulled her up. She raised a brow at him. "What direct orders? _What _headquarters?"

The redhead pushed his sunglasses farther up and placed a hand on her back, guiding her to the balcony. "Yes well, come with me."

"W-wait a second!" the blonde shouted, holding up her hands as she was pushed out into the cool air. "Where are we going?! Why are you wearing _sunglasses _at _night_?! Hey! Hey! You don't expect me to get into that helicopter, do you?! Loke! Lo—ah!"

Loke lifted her and set her on the ring ladder hanging out of the helicopter door. "Okay, up you go then, Miss Heartfilia."

"Excuse me?! Who do you think you are?! Hey!"

The redhead climbed over the balcony railing and grabbed onto the rope. "Okay boys, let's go." he yelled up to the pilots, then turned to Lucy. "I suggest you start climbing."

Lucy nodded furiously and began her ascension to where a suited man was waiting for her at the door. He helped her in and showed her to her seat, where she waited for Loke to join her. Once he had finished climbing, the redhead stepped inside and adjusted his suit and tie. Then, he looked at Lucy.

"Do you mind telling me where we're going _now_? Y'know, since you technically just _forced _me into a freaking _helicopter _and that counts as _kidnapping_, you know." the agitated blonde grunted, crossing her arms.

Loke flashed her an award-winning smile. "You'll see soon enough, Lucy."

After some time spent airborne, they landed somewhere on the outskirts of Magnolia. The suited man who had helped her in before unlocked and opened the door, and Loke jumped out before offering her a hand.

"We're here."

Lucy narrowed her eyes but accepted his hand. He helped her down from the copter, and the blonde decided to take a good look around her. They had landed on top of a large roof, and in the distance, she could see the lighted skyline of Magnolia.

Loke extended an arm and directed her forward. The blonde cleared her throat and smoothed her mussed pajamas as much as she could before walking on, the redhead following behind her. Ahead of her, a door opened and a woman with long blue hair stepped out.

She looked rather irritable, and Lucy felt a cold shiver run down her spine.

"Lucy Heartfilia, how good to meet you in person." the woman spoke, although her tone only held annoyance.

The blonde blinked and took in her full appearance. The woman—whose voice was strangely familiar—was dressed in a two-piece navy blue suit with a ruffled white blouse underneath. Her matching pumps gave her a height advantage on Lucy, and suddenly the sixteen-year-old felt very small and insignificant under the woman's scrutinizing gaze.

"Welcome to the Fairy Tail Secret Intelligence Agency Headquarters. I'm Aquarius, the woman who spoke with you over the phone earlier." Aquarius chose this moment to study her indigo-painted nails. "I take it that you've already met this flirt over here," she nodded in Loke's direction, "so let's get down to business shall we?"

She gave Lucy a terrifying glare that made the blonde shrink away. "Since, oh I don't know, you're the reason I'm late for my _date._"

Lucy nodded furiously, and Aquarius turned to walk inside the elevator. "Good. Follow me."

Once the two were inside and the older woman had selected their floor, she turned to the blonde. "This facility is the main headquarters for our agency, which was created my Mavis Vermillion several years ago, now it's run by Porylusica—my boss, by the way. We're a secret sector, and no one who works outside of this building even knows we exist." she gave Lucy a hard stare. "Now, one of our agents witnessed your…act for the sake of the greater good this afternoon, and she decided that it would be perfect if you and your team joined us."

Lucy hadn't said a word to the woman, but now she chose to speak up. "Um, excuse me but, I don't have a 'team', as you call it."

Aquarius rolled her eyes. "Well then what do you call that tiny blunette and that other moody scarlet-haired girl?"

The blonde gaped. "My _friends_? Levy and Erza?"

"That's them." the elevator dinged and the doors opened. "Anyhow, I've been assigned to your case for the time being, so I guess I'm like your recruiting agent, got it? Here are the rules: don't defy me, do as I say, don't interrupt my date—_ever, _and follow the rules. Okay? Okay. Now, I've got a date I'm late for because of _you, _so I'm going to leave now."

She stepped out of the elevator, leaving a wide-eyed and slack-jawed Lucy Heartfilia behind her.

"H-hey wait!" the blonde cried, reaching out a hand and running out of the elevator. "I-I have no idea what I'm supposed to do!"

And so, that was how sixteen-year-old Lucy Heartfilia became a teenage spy, but the story is just beginning.

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**end** **notes: **yeeeaah, so.


	2. Chapter 2

**chapter title: **Beautiful and Deadly

**notes: **i try. one of my favorite songs is unreleased, but i try.

**thoughts: **not sure what to classify this under besides romance, exactly. humor, some drama, and maybe a little suspense? idk, i'm sorry.

* * *

_._

_{And I'm gonna shine like a star, 'cause I'm the only me in this world}_

_._

* * *

"Lucy—_Kick_!"

"ARGH!"

The blonde watched in satisfaction as the man dropped to the ground, unconscious. She grinned and bent down, pulling out her lock picking set. She set to work on the handcuffs around the man's wrist with deep concentration. Her russet eyes flickered over to the briefcase the other side of the cuffs were attached to, before turning back to her work.

There was a small 'click', and the blonde fist-pumped the air. "Yes!"

Quickly, she removed the cuffs and grabbed the briefcase. She held her breath as she opened it, and let out a sigh of relief when she noticed that all of the vials were still in place and intact. She closed the metal case again and stood.

"Hey, I got it! All of the stolen chemicals are still here!" she grinned and held up a finger. "Not one is missing!"

Levy McGarden sighed in relief from her position at the array of computers across the room. "That's great news. I'm just downloading all their files onto a flash drive, and then I'll be more than ready to get out of this place."

Lucy Heartfilia spared a glance around the cylindrical room. "Hm, yes. Their interior decorating is certainly lacking. I'm thinking 'all supervillian' and no 'floral prints and fine china', unfortunately." she kicked a metal garbage can. "Seriously, can we fight a bad guy with a superb sense of style? That is all I ask."

Her blunette friend and partner glanced about the metal room and blinked at the glare reflecting off of all the metal surfaces. "At least we shouldn't have to worry about this guy anymore. He's going away for a _long _time thanks to all the virtual cookie crumbs he left me." she turned in the rolling chair and glanced down at an unconscious lackey at her feet. "Seriously you guys, next time you want to order a bomb off the black market, I suggest you try deleting all evidence from your hard drives afterward."

Lucy hummed to herself as she opened her 'compact' and dialed in a number. She waited a few seconds before a familiar snow-haired young woman came over the line.

"Lucy!" Mirajane Strauss, their handler, smiled brightly. "How did the mission go? Did you retrieve the stolen chemicals? Are you all okay?"

The blonde smiled and held up the metal briefcase. "All here, and we're safe and sound. Although, I haven't seen Erza in a little while, but I'm sure she's fine. Just disposing of the rest of the guards."

Mira breathed a sigh of relief. "That's wonderful news, Porlyusica will be happy to hear it."

"She will? Because, y'know, I thought she hated humanity and everything that it entailed." Lucy paused, smiling. "Including one of her best teams recovering some seriously dangerous and bad mojo from this guy."

She focused her compact downward and jabbed a thumb at the unconscious man lying on the floor.

Mira giggled. "Oh now, you know she worries about you. All of you. Except maybe for Cana, but." Lucy snorted and the white-haired woman continued. "There's a helicopter coming to pick you up in ten, be sure that Erza is ready to go as well."

The blonde nodded. "Kay, see you Mira."

"Bye Lucy!"

The screen went black and Lucy blinked at her reflection in the mirror before closing it. She turned back to her blunette best friend and genius who was just pulling a USB device out of one of the main hard drives.

Levy slipped the small gadget into her bag and looked up. "Okay, I think we're ready to go now."

Lucy nodded and stepped over the criminal she had previously rendered unconscious. The two teenage spies walked side-by-side over the metal grated floor and to the doorway. Lucy reached out a hand and turned the knob, and a blast of air hit them in the face.

The girls peered over the balcony and to the ground, seventy feet down. Levy shuddered and backed away a bit. Lucy smiled in return.

"Hey, at least this time it wasn't a crashing plane."

The petite blunette made a face and held up her hands. "Excuse me but, no. That is not something I _ever _wish to do again. I'm just glad that I was able to keep it from crashing into the ocean. And, I'm very thankful that you and Erza were there to take out the brutes because you know how I am at fighting."

Lucy elbowed her. "You're not bad at combat," she chuckled. "ISN'T THAT RIGHT ERZA?!" she shouted down to the scarlet-haired girl on the ground.

"WHAT?! LUCY, IS THAT YOU?"

The blonde waved a hand. "HEY YEAH! THE 'COPTER SHOULD BE HERE ANYTIME NOW, SO IF YOU WANT TO COME UP, THAT'D BE GREAT."

It was only a matter of seconds before their missing teammate had joined them, and Lucy patted her on the back. "Good job out there today, Titania. You will never fail to amaze me, and I'm very glad that we're on the same side."

Erza Scarlet smiled. "You didn't do too bad yourself today, Lucy."

"Well psh, I always do, don't I?"

Levy held up a forefinger. "Well I can think of a few times—,"

"Oh look, our ride is here!" Lucy interrupted, climbing on the balcony railing and grabbing a hold of the rope ladder dangling from the helicopter. "Time to go!"

Levy and Erza exchanged smiles before following her.

* * *

"We stopped a dangerous black market sale, a bomb from going off, and a major criminal and it's not even eight in the morning!" Lucy chirped as they entered the school grounds.

Levy nodded, hiding her yawn behind her right hand. "Yeah."

"It feels good, working alongside justice to stop the criminals in this world from destroying it." Erza smiled up at the early morning sky.

Lucy's messenger bag slid off her shoulder just a bit. "We stopped a dangerous black market sale, a bomb from going off, and a major criminal and it's not even eight in the morning." she reiterated, voice weary and eyes heavy.

Levy nodded again as she pulled open the front door of Fairy Tail Academy. "Yeah."

The other students of the school flooded the halls, talking and laughing loudly as the girls headed toward their lockers. Lucy leaned her forehead against the cool metal and groaned.

"I have a paper on the fall of the Extalian Empire due today and I _just remembered. _I am _so screwed._"

Levy smiled as she turned the combination code on her locker. "Don't worry Lu, you have third period free so you can write it then."

The blonde didn't move, but simply remarked, "Thank you, influenza, for striking my Calculus teacher yesterday. Although, I need to pass that class so don't let him die."

Erza and Levy chuckled before pulling out their books. The former patted her blonde friend on the shoulder. "Crime doesn't sleep Lucy, and if crime doesn't sleep, then neither do we."

Lucy pulled back and exasperatedly threw her hands up in the air. "Why?! Why can't criminals just _sleep the whole night _and _then _they can put their evil, diabolical plans into action?! Or better yet, why can't everyone just take a week off? Like, a vacation—for criminal masterminds and villainous scoundrels."

"I see that even though you're tired, your superb vocabulary is still in action. You'll do well on the English pop quiz today, then."

The blonde looked at her shorter friend in horror. "_What _pop quiz?"

Levy opened her mouth to respond but was cut off when her phone started to ring. Two other songs mixed together, and soon all three girls were searching in their bags for their mobiles.

As soon as the blunette found hers, she fixed her blonde friend with an unamused stare. "Really, Lucy. 'Once Upon a Dream'?"

The seventeen-year-old blushed. "Hey! It's a good song, okay? Lana Del Rey's remake is cool. Besides, you know that I like Disney movies…" she let her voice trail off at the end, before answering her incoming call.

"Hello?"

"Yeah hey, this is Lucy."

"Levy speaking."

Silence.

All three girls looked at each other.

That was until an annoyed female's voice came over all three lines.

"Finally_ you all pick up, I swear, you three are going to give me gray hairs before I turn thirty."_

Lucy's eye twitched. "Aquarius? What do you want?"

"_Excuse me, Heartfilia, but I am your recruiting agent and how dare you speak to me in that tone. You don't even have a boyfriend." _there was a pause. _"Well, none of you do, but that is beside the point right now." _

"Yes." Lucy answered through gritted teeth. "Yes that _is not_ relevant to this situation at all."

All three could picture Aquarius rolling her eyes. _"_Anyway, _Porlyusica would just like to let you all know that you need to meet in the _Literature Clubroom _after school because there's been a meeting called. Also, she hates humans, don't you three dare mess this up, etcetera etcetera. The usual." _

Erza nodded sternly. "Alright, we'll be there."

"_Good, because I don't want to have to come and drag you there myself. So, won't be seeing you later." _

The line went dead and the bell for first period rang. Lucy sighed heavily and slipped her phone back into her bag. "How did we get stuck with her? Why can't we have a normal recruiting agent like Aries?"

All she received in reply were two shrugs as the three girls headed to class.

* * *

"Okay, so, someone called and emergency meeting?" Cana Alberona popped the bubble she'd blown. "Something like this hasn't happened much; somebody must've really screwed up somewhere."

Juvia Lockser fidgeted with the strap of her bag. "Oh, Juvia hopes everything is alright."

Lucy waved a hand as they neared the clubroom—which wasn't really a clubroom at all, rather it was a cover-up. The Literature Club had been started as a cover for the spies attending Fairy Tail Academy. It was a place that they could meet without looking suspicious to the other—normal—students. Also, there was a secret passageway to their headquarters, which they would be taking today.

"I'm sure everything's fine." Levy assured as she opened the door and stepped inside.

Cana raised a brow and paused in chewing her bubble gum. "If that's the truth, then why are we _all _being called in?"

"Uh—Staff Appreciation Day?" Lucy supplied, and they all shot her a disbelieving glance. "Well I'm _sorry _for trying to be the optimist here."

Levy shrugged. "Who knows what's really going on? I mean—,"

The petite blunette was cut off when the floor underneath them gave way, and with a great rush, all five girls went dropped down the hole in its place.

"I WILL NEVER GET USED TO THIS!" Lucy shrieked, holding onto Cana's arm for dear life as the girls tumbled through the brightly lit tunnel.

They landed in a heap at the bottom, and several groaned. Erza pulled herself from the tangle of arms and legs and stood, brushing her skirt off and straightening her uniform. "Okay ladies, time to go now." she glanced in the direction of the tunnel they would be taking.

"Just…can you just give us a minute, Titania?" Cana mumbled, trying to regain the feeling in her right arm.

Juvia looked at the cushions under them with distrusting eyes. "Juvia does not think these break our fall very well."

"I second that." Levy groaned.

Lucy stood and cringed as her hip popped back into place. Her brown eyes flickered from the tunnel to her friends and she sighed. "Well, we'd better get going now. Y'know, before Aquarius _and _Porlyusica have our heads."

With some grumbling and complaining, the other girls stood and the group made their way through the tunnel. Surprisingly, it wasn't that long of a walk and they arrived in a short time.

"We're here now. Let the meeting commence so I can go home and watch the last three episodes of The Walking Dead I have recorded on my DVR." Cana announced as they stepped into the meeting room.

They were met with Mirajane's sweet smile. "Don't worry, Cana. This shouldn't take too long."

Lucy breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, I'm so glad it's you Mira. I'm not really in the mood for dealing with Aquarius' nagging right now."

The agent motion to the rather comfortable looking chairs around the large table. "Please, take a seat. We'll be starting shortly."

After the five had gotten comfortable, Mira began. She turned to the large television in front of the windows and cleared her throat. What looked like a power-point presentation appeared on the screen.

"As you all know, lately Fairy Tail Secret Intelligence Agency—or, as we call it, the FTIA—has been trying to expand." there were some murmurs and nods to continue. "Well, our gracious head of the agency, Miss Porylusica, has decided to partner up with another agency to do that. We'll combine agencies, and in doing so, combine forces."

Mirajane waited in silence for the chaos to break out.

And it did.

"What?!" Cana shouted. "What do you mean, 'combine'?!"

Erza slammed a fist on the table. "Yes, what does this mean, Mirajane?"

The ex-'demon spy' sighed and changed the slide on the screen. "It means that you'll be receiving new partners, and you'll be working together with them to help make this world a better place."

"But our teams are already full, Mira." Lucy put in.

"Yes well, there will be some…minor adjustments."

Cana rolled her eyes. "Great, fresh blood."

"Oh, no. They're not new to this, they're experienced—like yourselves. Also, there's one teeny, tiny little detail I haven't told you yet."

Erza raised a brow. "And that is?"

Mira chuckled nervously. "Erm, they're guys."

"WHAT?!"

* * *

**end notes: **it became a little rushed at the end, sorry. also, i realize that loke is part of the ftia, but for the purposes of this story, there aren't many other guys in the agency other than him. yes the guys will come in next chapter and _yes _natsu will be making his debut appearance.


End file.
